Thursday, March 03, 2005

choosing sex

in a post below, a comment was made about choosing to have sex. funnily, choice looked like this: 'choice'

why is that? why put " around choice? because it isn't? because women can't make them? because it's someone else's choice? why?

just curious.

and so here's a thought my alter-ego had about choosing sex. it might offend some, make some think or make someone send me an email explaining why i'm a bad christian.

to which i say: duuuude.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

i read your "altar ego" post. which got me thinking about society in general. why do people do things they don't want to do? i don't mean like going to work; i mean, if a person doesn't want to follow the tenets of the christian faith, why bother being a christian? if i said i was a huge boston red sox fan, but never went to any games, maybe watched a couple on tv, didn't listen to the games on the radio, didn't know where they were in the standings, could i really call myself a sox fan? i'm interested in your thoughts because i've been thinking about this for some time.

Delia Christina said...

ah, so the fact that i have been sexually active means that i'm not following the tenets of the christian faith.

which are...?

Anonymous said...

dude! is this a trick question? you're the deacon in training, surely you know the tenets of the chrisitan faith (btw, this is tongue in cheek humor). i'm speaking of the overall admonitions of christ. the fact that i am a malicious gossip would mean that i am not following the tenets of the christian faith. the fact that you are sexually active doesn't mean you're not a christian. it is an indicator of the quality of your relationship with christ. jesus said, "if you love me you will obey me". if a person is truly seeking to walk with christ there is usually an element of conviction re misdeeds. Trust me, as a parent my kids ask me 1000 times a day why they can't jump off the couch with scissors - they don't realize the the guidelines i've established are for their own benefit. i'm not trying to be mean - i love them too much. what it all boils down to is: do i love christ enough, am i so committed to christ that i will choose him over sin? what a total drag to live a quasi-christian existence. always having to battle between what god wants and what i want. i want to be totally sold it to him. doesn't every christian? i thought that was the whole purpose. you know, living your life so it brings glory to god, etc ~ perhaps i am a touch naive.

Delia Christina said...

one, i'm not a child running with scissors.

two, i am the deacon in training and the most rational way of answering your question is this:

we do what we do because we are all frail, imperfect creatures. ah, to have ideological and spiritual purity - never to make a mistake, never to sin, never to place a foot wrong.

i'd rather live this life of acknowledged spiritual struggle than to live in a hermetically sealed box, assured of never having done anything wrong.

Anonymous said...

have i given the impression that i have lived a life of "ideological and spiritual purity - never having made a mistake, never sinning, never placing a foot wrong" or that i "live in a hermetically sealed box"? if so, i apologize because certainly that would be an inaccurate picture. who the heck lives like that? the crux of all of this is that jesus didn't get nailed to the cross so we could say, "well, i'm frail, and at least i'm acknowledging my spiritual struggle". it's vitally important that we acknowledge our struggles and human frailties but we can't continue in our sin. what a waste that would be! jesus died so that we, with his sustaining grace and strength, would rise above the yick and sin of this world. what's the point of his death and resurrection if we blithely continue down the path of sin? you said you are a deacon in training and were responding "rationally" - does that mean that i am being irrational? am i missing something?

Delia Christina said...

jc,
no you're not being unrealistic,i'm just ... i guess tired would be the word... of that premarital sex rule. i honestly don't see the big deal.

i don't want to ever get married. ever. so that means i shouldn't ever ever have sex? i'd still be a virgin. (and i only just got rid of it 9 yrs ago!!)

i like being sexual with the person in my life (person, not persons). i just get totally skeeved out at marriage - it is like my children thing - i don't want ever to have kids. i know these things in the fiber of my being. if i found out that i was pregnant i'd have a total mental breakdown and i'd do everything i could to not be it.

so. no marriage and no motherhood - the main reasons for sex in our religion. what to do?

that little rule we christians have - thou shalt not have sex unless you are married...well, it just pisses me off. what's the big deal?

(plainly conscious of her whiny tone...)

Anonymous said...

ding - (btw, that's the same nickname a friend uses with me - how whacked is that!)

i SO totally see where you're coming from. there are a lot of "rules" that get me hacked. the key thing you said, "the little rule we christians have" - dude - it's god's rule, not ours. and that therefore, is "the big deal". if i thought it was all some man made stuff i'd hang it - but it's god and you can't diss god.

hang in there - it's not always easy to choose christ, but it's totally worth it. i must say - it's a LOT easier when it's a sold out situation, not a half-way gig. hope that makes sense ~ you know, the being sold out to christ thing.

i'm quite interested in seeing where this particular dialogue takes you as you continue down the path of christian maturity and deaconess stuff ;)

Delia Christina said...

see, but when i think about these rules and about how all of them are behavior based...

i was going to spin out into another line of argument but i just got mentally tired.

i guess i'm just going to be that perpetually pissed of christian, then.